Friday, September 4, 2009

Watch Out

So work today was pretty awesome. I really enjoyed working today and saw some pretty interesting injuries. I learned how to relocated a shoulder :)

Yesterday night, I hung out with Melissa and Becca. We went to eat at Villa Montez (which was okay, but I wasn't really impressed), played rockband, and went to Starbucks for Pumpkin Spice frapps. One thing that we talked about was what we were looking for in a mate. My specifications I was told were lame since half male population would fit in it. I guess saying that I just want a tall skinny white boy doesn't really get me far. I could add someone who likes to be outside and hiking/bicycling/canoeing/kayaking...I don't know. I think I'm just going to let fate happen and when that guy finds me, it'll be gravy.

Anyways, I really wasn't going to post anything but a conversation I had tonight made me decide to. Here's a short back story:

This summer, I met this guy who I couldn't believe would talk to me. I was awestruck, dumbfounded, enamored, and pretty much let my emotions flow freely. I was pretty much convinced that I was done for and I didn't want to see anyone but him. He lived kind of far away, but I went to see him (because that's how much of an idiot I am). Anyways, we had our fun that week and then I saw him once again later in the summer. The second visit I realized that my chances were over and done with. However, me being the girl I am, I didn't give up hope. Needless to say, it was all a big sham and I got the short end of the stick. I had already been dumped a month before hand and this just added onto it. What hurt the most was realizing that I had put a lot of myself into nothing, which made me realize how stupid I am. As you've probably read before, the emotions I felt were something new and amazing. If this was just a fluke, I really wonder what it's like to be happy with someone.

Anyways, this guy talked to me tonight and apologized to me for leading me on. Yeah, great, whatever. It really sucks bad to see how someone you thought so highly of is just like all the boys before him: A douche. The time I went to see him was pretty much just a booty call for him (and no, we didn't do anything R-rated, hardly PG). It sucks, and it sucks bad. Being apologized to made me feel even more idiotic. It's like "Oh, hey I realize that I duped you into thinking I really liked you, but I didn't, haha." Thanks. I doubt he even reads this, but if he does, he pretty much knows all of this. I told him. I'm still a bit sad over this and I shouldn't be. Stupid girl emotions.

Another idea I have, that I got from Becca, was to write a letter to my previous relationships and say goodbye. She's writing letters to her future husband, but letting go of someone might be easier if I just write what I wish I could say to them. Honestly, I probably could say it to them, but I don't think they'd appreciate it. It's not like I'm going to say nasty things about them, but rather they wouldn't believe it or they don't want to hear it. I know the last time I saw my most recent ex, he was quite upset about it. Putting people through emotional stress isn't something I like to do.

Sorry that this is kind of a crappy post. I'm looking forward to work tomorrow. I get to work with one of the newer doctors which is always exciting. Other than that, I will look forward to Sunday night. Hope you kids are doing swell.

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